hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
