i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
please come you make the beer taste better
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
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My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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