using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
