Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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