you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
