idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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