we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Boobs are out for the taking
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
