We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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