Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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