i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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