Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
