They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
How does one acquire holy water?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize