Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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