Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
