"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I see more hoeing in ur future
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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