You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
