the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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