This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
