Tell her she can't have a vagina
I skipped work to stalk him.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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