I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize