My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
