Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
