I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
