Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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