Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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