Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
He better not be in your backpack
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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