please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
