you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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