Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
they need to just BURY HIM!
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
