i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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