OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize