Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Randomize
