You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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