you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
