there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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