I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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