That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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