I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
