Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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