Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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