Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
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