I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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