dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
