Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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