I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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