That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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