Texts From Last Night

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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo

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  (978): so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo http://tfl.nu/rg6x
  Replies (36) Good night (6083) Bad night (1196)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.

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  (612): life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix. http://tfl.nu/ht0i
  Replies (32) Good night (632) Bad night (4791)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.

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  (918): Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine. http://tfl.nu/dowa
  Replies (31) Good night (1862) Bad night (3633)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.

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  (517): My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance. http://tfl.nu/kmco
  Replies (18) Good night (809) Bad night (4631)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad

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  (201): he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad http://tfl.nu/jzas
  Replies (40) Good night (714) Bad night (4253)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity

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  (502): Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity http://tfl.nu/qinl
  Replies (67) Good night (11944) Bad night (1183)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  So gin and wine won't be happening again

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  (603): So gin and wine won't be happening again http://tfl.nu/oyej
  Replies (16) Good night (916) Bad night (3446)
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  (949): View more from California

  is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??

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  (949): is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute?? http://tfl.nu/snv5
  Replies (11) Good night (8052) Bad night (1056)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.

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  (641): My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning. http://tfl.nu/bmvl
  Replies (8) Good night (2260) Bad night (933)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.

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  (478): Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up. http://tfl.nu/imv1
  Replies (11) Good night (4102) Bad night (1583)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet

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  (812): He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet http://tfl.nu/4ir7
  Replies (7) Good night (2541) Bad night (741)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.

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  (724): Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies. http://tfl.nu/sr2h
  Replies (17) Good night (2769) Bad night (570)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.

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  (928): I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug. http://tfl.nu/ikjc
  Replies (2) Good night (1227) Bad night (460)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning

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  (630): We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning http://tfl.nu/kk2v
  Replies (6) Good night (1226) Bad night (448)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together

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  (816): First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman. (540): Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together http://tfl.nu/87tf
  Replies (3) Good night (968) Bad night (386)

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