Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.

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(410): He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go. http://tfl.nu/s9bl

Replies (4) Good night (837) Bad night (1636)
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(208): View more from Idaho

you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack

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(208): you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack http://tfl.nu/46lg

Replies (28) Good night (1018) Bad night (4465)
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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.

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(321): You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called. http://tfl.nu/6o7h

Replies (12) Good night (1051) Bad night (5762)
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(254): View more from Texas

our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day

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(254): our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day http://tfl.nu/vjaj

Replies (25) Good night (1765) Bad night (5690)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm never eating chinese again.

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(215): yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night. (215): i'm never eating chinese again. http://tfl.nu/0tg8

Replies (11) Good night (924) Bad night (4522)
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(740): View more from Ohio

Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.

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(740): Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party. http://tfl.nu/kjr7

Replies (6) Good night (3688) Bad night (1187)
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(607): View more from New York

Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?

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(607): Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be? http://tfl.nu/nsuv

Replies (31) Good night (3128) Bad night (928)
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(954): View more from Florida

It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.

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(954): It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride. http://tfl.nu/ze4c

Replies (4) Good night (2614) Bad night (1736)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.

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(859): She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times. http://tfl.nu/xxc1

Replies (8) Good night (1315) Bad night (3708)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you

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(843): Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you http://tfl.nu/1rr1

Replies (2) Good night (840) Bad night (686)
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(904): View more from Florida

Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.

(1-904): View more from Florida

I told you to check, dude

(904): View more from Florida

Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.

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(904): Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday. (1-904): I told you to check, dude (904): Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out. http://tfl.nu/ef5z

Replies (14) Good night (1619) Bad night (679)
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(865): View more from Tennessee

I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries

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(865): I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries http://tfl.nu/egp0

Replies (2) Good night (434) Bad night (752)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!

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(618): Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT! http://tfl.nu/daki

Replies (4) Good night (1838) Bad night (756)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry

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(610): Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry http://tfl.nu/g7mi

Replies (3) Good night (807) Bad night (449)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.

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(414): I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint. http://tfl.nu/3iia

Replies (1) Good night (756) Bad night (339)

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