We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
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