Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
