I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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